The idea of first spilling the beans and confessing to your partner that you’ve fallen in love can fill people with extreme euphoria or incredible nerves, and sometimes both at the same time! But no matter whether you approach the discussion with nerves or confidence there is no doubt that it is an important rite of passage in any relationship.
So, how do you know when is the right time to say “I love you”? And how can you tell if it is too soon? Well, each relationship is unique and as individual as each person involved, but there are some guidelines you can follow to give you a general idea of how to approach this important moment in any relationship.
How to know if it is too soon to say “I Love You”
The main indicators of the right time to confess your feelings will be your own feelings and the behaviours and words of your partner. If you are both clearly head over heels and committed then it may arrive relatively quickly, but if you have both been a bit more casual in the beginning it may take a little longer until you utter those three little words.
It is, however, important that you give the relationship time to breathe and don’t confuse initial infatuation with love. It usually isn’t until your relationship is tested, either by extreme situations or mundane everyday routine, that you’ll be able to properly judge the strength of both of your feelings.
What signs should you look for before saying “I Love You?”
Before you commit to developing your relationship further with declarations of undying love, there are some signs to watch out for and things to think about. In the exciting rush of new romance and relationships, it can be easy to overlook the little signs which you need to consider before trying to move the relationship forward. Before saying I love you, you should consider:
- Are you both on the same page? You may be overwhelmed with the strengths of your feelings, but are there any signs that your partner feels the same way? Blurting out an “I love you” before you have got the opportunity to discover what the two of you are like in an everyday relationship may scare away someone who could turn out to your soulmate later on.
- Have your discussed your ambitions, dreams, and future plans? Consider long term compatibility and whether there is any chance of your relationship becoming long term. Saying “I love you” and committing to a deeper relationship may come with extra expectations and responsibilities if you’re planning to work or study far away in the near or distant future.
- Have you spent enough time with each other doing everyday things? Romantic events and expensive dinners are fun, but you won’t get a true indication of your compatibility until you have spent a substantial amount of time together living out every day life. Do you still enjoy each other’s company, laugh, and get those giddy feelings in casual settings and doing routine tasks?
When it comes down to it, there are no hard and fast rules for choosing the right time to say “I love you.” Ultimately it will be up to you to judge your feelings and how you think your partner will react to your confession, you might decide to wait it out a while, or blurt it out tonight. Trust your gut, but don’t forget to also use your head!
